Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
