There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
