Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
