foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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