Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
