before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
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