Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
