I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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