my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I FOUND THE LEGS
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Randomize