Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
he was CRYING into my vagina
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Randomize
