There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
