morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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