She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
