Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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