She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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