i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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