her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
