If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
