i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Everyone says I win the strip club
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
