aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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