So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
