Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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