Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
