Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
