Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize
