I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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