Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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