Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
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