At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Randomize
