I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
