as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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