she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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