that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
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