Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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