Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
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