we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
My pussy is not your playground.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize