ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
there is puke in my bra ... again
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