On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Randomize
