Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize