Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Randomize