is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
