I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Randomize
