in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
how drunk are you?
Several
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
