It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Randomize
