found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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