We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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