That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Randomize
