Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
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