This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Randomize
