Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
